Dear TNR:
I did not know that Mary Cheney was going to have a baby. Still less did I know that this baby presented a personal problem for me – a conundrum, no less. In a time of war and momentous ideological struggle, thank you for taking a moment to warn me of this fresh unforeseen threat. Forgive me if my reaction seems ungrateful.
Mary Cheney’s baby is none of your damn business. Who the hell do you people think you are, the Gay Standards & Practices Committee? Why don’t you keep your sheet-sniffing ferret noses out of other peoples’ laundry?
However many things I have failed to decry in this life, and however profound my baby-induced existential crisis is, I must decline your offer to have Andrew Sullivan dissect me for nine bucks and some change. In fact, if Andrew is looking for something to do, why don’t you tell him to get his own head and ass wired back together into some kind of functional apparatus? If he did he might start making occasional sense again.
Feel free to contact me if you have anything to say that isn’t utterly moronic.
* stands on chair and cheers loudly *
Glen adds: 'It’s not the fact that the New Republic has decided to pester a baby that makes me mad, per se. It’s the fact that so many responsible liberals, for whom TNR once served as a flag ship, still insist on retreating into frivolities like this one.' Go read the rest of this magnificent post.
I wanted to write to TNR too when I saw that article. The thing is, it's not substantially different from every other sneering piece from the left-of-center press. These are the guys that will go and dig up some quote from some fringe-right-wing group and say "Look! See what a hard time those lesbian Republicans have!"
It's because the liberal Left needs Archie Bunker. They can't deal with a rational, moderate, center-to-right mainstream; so they drag up the boogeymen they know they can defeat. And they have to convince their liberal audience, and themselves, that those Archie Bunkers are the threat to America that only they - the liberal establishment - can defeat. What a transparent farce. What an insult.
As I observed earlier, most of the news coverage of the Cheney pregnancy has been gratuitously nasty. The only unequivocally positive statement I could find came from - you guessed it - President Bush. I quoted the media on the couple of issues - specifically the lesbian couple's legal standing in their home state of Virginia and Bush's previous comments on same-sex parenting - that were legitimate and directly relevant to the story.
As my regular readers know, and as you'll know from reading my previous post, I do not shy away from speaking up on gay domestic issues, and I don't hesitate to criticize social conservatives when I think it's appropriate. But I also understand that the conservative world is far richer and deeper than the liberal media's caricature would allow us to believe. And I don't need the intellectual pipsqueaks at The New Republic telling me what I'm supposed to think about this.
Because, with all due respect to the late Carroll O'Connor, Archie Bunker is dead.
